Member-only story
We Need to Change How We Talk About Fathers
Two years ago I was at a county fair with my husband, my son, and our 1-year-old daughter. When my daughter needed a new diaper, rather than take her into a Fairground public restroom and require my son to leave the concert he was listening to, I spread out my changing pad on the grass and proceeded to change my baby. No sooner had I had begun wiping her tiny hiney than an older woman walked up behind me.
“I can’t believe you would do that here. You should be using the restrooms!” She scolded
Like usual, when someone says something inappropriate to me I’m too shocked to respond immediately. Later on, of course, I thought of so many creative ways I could have responded. Thinking of those things later is never helpful.
A few hours later my husband noticed that my daughter, again, needed a new diaper. He proceeded to lay her on the grass and change her diaper just as I had. This time another woman from town walked up to him.
“Oh! What a good father, changing a diaper. Good job, Dad. It’s nice of you to help out,” she cooed in his direction.
I was enraged. On the same day, my husband was praised, and I was shamed for the exact same behavior. You might think I’m upset about how I was treated. The woman who corrected me was completely inappropriate. However, I’m perfectly…
